WHEN Andrew Bolt takes charge at the Age, he could make no better first decision than to recruit current colleague Mark Knight, whose cartoons on that paper's Opinion page would announce the failing, flailing broadsheet has re-gained an understanding of the city and state in which it is published:
If your rusted on Age readers object, Knight could always place a duck or man with a curly hat somewhere in the frame. That would keep them happy.
For non-Victorians, the fellow in the bear suit is our hapless, hopeless Premier Ted Baillieu, who just shed a staggering 11 points in the latest job-approval poll. Mind you, Knight has exercised a cartoonist's liberty to exaggerate. In Knight's rendering, Big Ted's resolute expression suggests he knows what he is doing and where he wishes to take our state.
It is clearly a joke. Big Ted has never demonstrated the slightest suggestion of such certainties.
UPDATE: Readers with notions of who might make a better premier are invited to register their suggestions in comments.
Me.
ReplyDeleteGet the professor a seat>
ReplyDeletePeter Ryan?
ReplyDeletePeter Ryan by a country mile.
DeleteSo the rusted on Leftists get replaced by the neoconservative Bolt with us real conservatives still fumbling around in the dark without a voice. The modern Australian political scene, what's not to like?
ReplyDeleteAnyone but Ted? A Bunyip would be ideal.
ReplyDeleteBernie Finn would be my choice.
ReplyDeleteMinny Mouse?
ReplyDeleteDonald Duck?
Lassie?
Are you Kevin the Rudd? Isn't that your previos ministry?
DeleteEddie Maguire.
ReplyDeleteCameron Thomson.. He'd get things moving.
ReplyDeleteCraig?
DeleteSam Kekovich
ReplyDeleteYou know it makes sense!
DeleteWell at least now I know why Bolt has been so loudly supporting homosexuals and denouncing basic Christian belief. For a spot at the Age, one must sell one's soul?
ReplyDeleteYou Vics are funny people! Didn't you give us Menzies and Bolte? What happened? Now you give us Gillard (OK a SA shoo-in) and Big Ted alias 'Petro Baillieu'. Since you Vics do seem very keen on ALP types for Premiers, I do have a few suggestions.
ReplyDeleteTime for another import. How about taking Bob Carr and getting strong-arm union heavies from NSW? Don't reject it too quickly. Bob and his knuckle-dragging pals have reduced the ALP to rump status in NSW. That is a real positive!
OK, that didn't go down well. Then from Qld I understand there's a little lady who will soon be available. You'll never have to spend a cent on dams again. Maybe you'll even get another desal plant.
OK, OK. How about SA's very own 'media-Mike' Rann currently in forced retirement, and he'll bring his pal Bob Ellis to charm you. The sexual antics of both are worthwhile theatre.
I was trying to help, but if you want to be positive, why go past the mighty Bunyip. He'll stay anonymous and play a lot of golf, and there will be no grand plans to spend other people's money.
-Carl
PS Do read Niki Savva's piece in the Oz today.
Prof, what you and Andrew Bolt have to realise is that homophobes are just ordinary people who have been born with the anti-gay gene AF29c. These people can't help what they are and they need to be loved and accepted and publicly fondled just like everyone else in Gaytopia.
ReplyDeleteThree cheers for anti-anti-homophobic free speech blogs where science gets it right.
Whatya reckon about having Jeff back? Much more fun.
ReplyDeleteJoseph Kony
ReplyDeletePeter Costello will be looking for a new job after getting knocked back to chair the Future Fund. I think he and Ted would make a great team.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't mind seeing Peter Ryan slip into Ted's chair. At least he has some guts and is prepared to speak his mind unlike Big Ted who reminds me of another useless, do-nothing, timid premier of recent times - mister zero charisma himself, Steve Bracks.
ReplyDeleteBenjamin Netanyahu would be Bolt's pick.
ReplyDeleteQuite Right Anonymous. The confusion of these people is finally surfacing. I propose Andrew and Bob Brown do the lecture circuit tour of Middle Eastern Capitals teaching, nay warning, about the dire threats posed by rampant right wing homophobia.
ReplyDeleteThere; confused ideologies sorted. 101. Next lesson?
Going by the way his has been sweet talking PNG, Bob Carr might be looking for work soon.
ReplyDelete