Persons Of Interest

WANTED

Tony "Black Arts" Hodges

Sought for questioning in connection with a Canberra race riot. Hodges is believed to travelling incognito and is said to enjoy the protection of the Parliamentary Press Gallery. Not believed to be dangerous unless encountered in company with pale people wearing Indigenous war paint and waving spears.

Hodges may be travelling with this woman, who presents herself as an Aborigine. Attention should therefore be paid to grant-issueing establishments.

Kim "Humpytown Crier" Sattler

Anyone observing this pair should contact the press on 03 8667 2250 and report the duo's whereabouts. Then they should call that number and repeat the information all over again, and again, and again, and again, and again. Do not be discouraged by  loud yawns on the other end of the phone. That is the sound of quality journalism and is entirely normal.

Grech Should Have Been So Lucky

ONE of the criticisms often directed at conservatives is that we prefer to live in the past -- and that is absolutely correct. If only the clock could be turned back, how nice it would be to re-visit the latter half of June, 2009, when Godwin Grech was holed-up in his Canberra home while an infestation of press people ruined the nature strip. They were there for weeks, recording in minute detail what neighbours thought of the Utegate mystery man, the parcels he received and any other scraps of trivia that came to hand.

Today, after just these few short years, look how standards have slipped. A Gillard staffer, Tony Hodges, begins a chain of events leading to a race riot, is fired and promptly vanishes. So, too, the white rabbit of Humpytown, Kim Sattler.  POOF!...and she is gone without a trace. There seems no curiosity to find either of them, which could not be that difficult, or to press for the answers that the disgrace on Australia Day at the The Lobby demands.

There is only one difference between then and now. When Grech’s hijinx came unstuck it was a Liberal leader, Malcolm Turnbull, who appeared gullible, crooked or both. Now that it is the Labor Prime Minister who must explain herself, there is not the slightest effort on the part of the press to find either of the two people most relevant to the matter. The inconsistency would be shocking if not so predictable.

Gillard's White Rabbit

IT'S JUST  a thought, a dreamy little reverie, but wouldn't it be lovely to have some audio of Kim Sattler playing at Paul Revere in Humpytown. Michael Anderson had this to say about the moment Team Gillard reached out to oppressed:

“There was a lady running around here when I was doing a radio interview and she said the prime minister’s office wants to talk to you and I thought she was joking and said I’ll talk later,” he told reporters.

So maybe the reporter caught it on tape or over the phone, and perhaps can confirm that Sattler was no mere freelance gabble-guts but a direct emissary from the PM's office. That would just about do her in. It is impossible to clear this point with Sattler because she has made herself scarce.


At the very least it would be interesting to know the reporter's name and to have this question answered: "Did you hear Sattler present herself as representing Prime Minister Gillard?"

Of course it is too much to hope. A reporter with such information would have come forward by now to claim a scoop. Surely that would be the case. Don't you reckon?