Sunday, July 24, 2011

Gone To The Dogs

OUR government has a website that urges Australians to save the planet from the carbon curse by, amongst other things, sleeping with our dogs -- an inanity the Silly reports without comment until the last paragraph, when it passes on the information that "opposition climate change spokesman, Greg Hunt, branded the government's advice farcical."

Yes, the very last paragraph.

As for the photo (above), that is how the Silly chose to illustrate the coming joys of power penury. The caption also demonstrates how close to the abyss Fairfax has come. Apparently dogs also do the paper's sub-editting, as the illiterate caption makes clear: "Keeping green ... the Stanbridge and Winslade familes gathers around to play a board game."

No indication of who the Stanbridge and Winslade familes (sic) might be, where they live, or why two clans deserve a singular verb, a misspelling and the tautological "around".


UPDATE: More advice on staying warm from our disgrace of a government.
1/ Put an extra blanket on the bed.
2/ Close the door
3/ Turn off heaters
4/ Open curtains when the sun shines
5/ Spurn showers
6/ Huddle with kin under a blanket
7/ Ride a bloody bike
8/ Hang washing on the line
9/ Turn off appliances
10/ Don't waste food.

Somewhere in Australia, some poor sucker contributed what would no doubt be a year's worth of taxes to pay the consultant who compiled that list. Let's hope he or she enjoys fleas between the sheets.


22 comments:

  1. The govt website offers a useful factoid:

    "62 per cent of people who usually travel to work or study travel less than 20 kilometres."

    Great to know. Now that the govt has armed me intellectually, what should I do with this power?

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  2. The Warmies need to make up their (collective) minds. Just recently we were told to ditch the dogs in aid of stopping "global warming" because they're twice as bad for the environment as SUVs.

    I'm surprised the government isn't giving out free copies of Time to Eat the Dog: The Real Guide to Sustainable Living.

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  3. Can't wait til someone points out how sleeping with one's dogs is culturally offensive to lefties' favourite identity group. Raaaaacist!

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  4. I like to put washing on the line before the rinse cycle and leave it out for two rain cycles and letting it dry solid on the line before bringing it it!

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  5. The average person can teleport up to 20kms with minimal CO2 emissions

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  6. Burning candles, for the equivalent illumination, would cost far more than using electric lights, and is far more polluting. So, are the two families (or, at least, the designer of the photograph) just stupid, or are we being taught some sort of lesson which escapes me for the moment?

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  7. I don't have a dog. This is discrimination. I expect a fully funded dog from the government.

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  8. Given the oh so patient when-a-mummy-and-a-daddy-really-love-each-other tone, I suspect the Prime Minister's script writer knocked it out as part of a job lot.

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  9. My bike is made of carbon fibre - does that count as a carbon capture and storage device? Or do our new Green overlords now say that's bad?
    Seriously this is getting beyond parody.

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  10. P.s. Verification code = BEDNEST. You've got a wicked sesnse of humor!

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  11. Well if we need to save power how about the following

    1. The ending of any sport events after dark.
    2. Switch of street lights.
    4. Reducing shopping hours to daylight only.
    5. Switch off lights in government and commercial buildings.
    6. Creation of a rural industry which dries cow dung for household heating.
    7. Clubs, pubs etc may continue as long as only LED torches are used.
    8. One government theatre will be built per population centre which will show one show per week. All others will be closed.
    9. Only 53 cm TV to be allowed.
    10. Air conditioning to be banned.

    Repeat after me "If it works it is not Green, comrade"

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  12. Pam,

    That's a good idea although I prefer hanging up the washing while it's raining, so that I can save water on showers for myself as well.

    Admittedly thanks to man-made climate change, it's sometimes months or even years before it rains in Sydney...

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  13. It's a three-dog night, but only one is available. What next?

    Cheers

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  14. Our pet is a budgie...not much warmth to go around. What if you have a goldfish?

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  15. Hey "Anonymous", if that really is your name, take your pinko the-Government-should-buy-me-a-dog socialism to the Green Left Weekly. That's dog redistribution, buddy.

    Anyway, what compensation do people who bought their own dogs get once the Government starts rolling out its free dog program?

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  16. I can't take much more of them. They're bloody mad.

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  17. I have two dogs; can I rent one out to an OAP and get some government subsidy in return?

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  18. If you don't happen to have a dog or can't borrow one you can always lay down with a Labor politician,it's much the same thing,although dogs are generally cleaner.

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  19. But best of all, demand an election and change he Federal Government.

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  20. A much better idea is to chop down every tree on your nearest nature strip and burn them! It will keep you AND your dog warm all winter.

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  21. The funny thing is that if it was a conservative govt that was telling citizens how to save money by switching off the light before going to bed, or planning your car journey before you drive, the entire Media establishment including "Their ABC" would be mocking the govt for being like granny. Yeah, what else? Sleep with a cat to stay warm?? Well, I like sleeping with a pussy or two too.

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  22. It would be bad enough if the gillard junta turned Australia into New Zealand or South Africa but they seem committed to turning us into North Korea.

    That dog won't hunt, Monsignor.

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