Friday, August 16, 2013

Spooky Jessica

Over drinks last night, Doctor Yowie first raised a toast to the Collins Street specialist who confirmed the Professor's robust good health, then wondered if there might not be some brain damage after all. It was mention of blonde sort-of economist Jessica Irvine (and several bottles of Tasmanian pinot noir) that prompted his sarcasm.

"What did they see in her at News Ltd!"

"You don't know her unique qualification?"

"Unqualified credulity?"

"Well, there's that, but I suspect having a dad who runs ASIO didn't hurt either"

Could this be true? If so, let us hope in the interests of the nation's security that Jessica is one piece of fruit who fell very far from David Irvine's tree

UPDATE: Nobody could claim Jessica a fit candidate for the intelligence business, so whoever hired her at News Ltd is stuck with his recruit until Col Allan pauses between mouthfuls of fairy penguin and roast infant to fire him. Jessica explains girlynomics:

5. What’s the most unusual problem you’ve ever solved with economics?
You’re talking about my weight loss articles, aren’t you? Through doing Bridges’ program last year I encountered the most magical of all statistics - more exciting that the budget balance, the jobless rate or foreign debt. It’s the figure for the calorie deficit you need to build over time to shed one kilogram of fat. The figures is about 7,500 calories - and is roughly the calorie content of one kilo of fat. Weight issues are all about the supply of calories to the body versus the demand the body has for them. Every day you need a certain amount of calories to carry out the body’s basic needs - growing eyelashes, keeping your heart beating and firing your muscles to brush your teeth.

For someone of my age height and weight it is around 1500 calories (you can find out your own ‘‘basal metabolic rate’’ from any number of online calculators including this). So every day you get to eat a certain amount of  without putting on weight (for me, 1500). If you eat more, the body stores the excess energy in fat cells. If you eat less energy than your body needs - either because you reduce your intake, increase your energy needs through exercise, or both - you lose weight. Once you build a cumulative calorie deficit of 7,500 calories, you will lose about one kilo of weight. BAM! Once you know this, you can make better decisions about what to eat and how much to exercise you need to do to keep you at the weight you’re happy with. It’s more accounting than economics, but it works.


16 comments:

  1. Irvine senior "Friend of Rudd", his choice of friends makes one wonder how he got the job.

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  2. She has sex appeal?

    It sure isn't her fine grasp of logic and fiscal machinations.

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  3. I hate to disillusion poor Jessica , but she has real problems with numbers . 1kg of fat = 9000 cals last time I looked.

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    Replies
    1. Not quite:
      http://www.caloriesperhour.com/tutorial_pound.php

      Cheers

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  4. Prof, check this out:

    http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/nation/mum-tears-a-strip-off-uni-for-orgy-acting/story-e6frg6nf-1226698061680

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  5. Hmm, Jess, Jess, Jess. I think you'll find the human metabolic system is a little more complex than bad arithmetic. Frankly I doubt that we have even the remotest clue how the system actually works.
    And I keep asking myself this question whenever a sweaty lump in lycra jogs past me, at risk of an instant heart attack, or at least of destroying my sexual drive forever: Why the crap does anybody care if they're a little paunchy?

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    Replies
    1. Err, well we do have an idea about the Laws of Thermodynamics. The most energy that can be released from 1 g of fat is 37 kJ -- about 9 calories(what kind of brain dead bimbo under the age of 60 uses calories anyway).

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  6. she is not an economist but a true socialist social-engineer. she says as much on her profile you linked. Declaring "economics is all about dividing a finite amount of resources". ummm ... always thought the fundamental thing was about growing the pie so more for all?
    suspect News Ltd wanted an "economics for dummies" type for their regional rags but f***ed it up.

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  7. Her mentor is Ross Gittins, author of 'Tony Abbott must share blame for mining tax' (18 Feb 2013) - arguably the most ridiculous piece of journalism written this year. Or decade.

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  8. Typical. So little sympathy for refugees. Setting off from Spencer Street ...

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  9. I met Irvine senior a few years ago - he seemed to have his head screwed on tight. If I was him, I'd be getting the sprog DNA tested........

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    1. According to his Wiki page David Irvine is 65 years old. He attended an upper-crust Anglican boarding in Perth and studied Elizabethan History before becoming a diplomat..clearly old-school old-fashioned stuffiness, but no mention of any conjugal issue, female or otherwise..

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Irvine_(diplomat)

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  10. now I see your grand world-view Prof. irvine on sky news tonight sitting next to Cleo editor. What other serious economics-type would go there? Absurdity.

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  11. Elizabeth (Lizzie) B.August 17, 2013 at 6:40 AM

    She's a terrible economist and an even worse accountant, Prof. But so am I on a Friday nite in Ireland. I started worrying about the rhubarb crumble I had this arvo at Newgrange neolithic monument cafe. 5000 calories in that alone I expect. And Irish Guinness stew with four potatoes last night and then the whiskey and beer just now plus Da Hairy Ape says he t'inks I need to go eat now .... because I am a little unsteady in the brain department it seems. Just like Jess. My numbers are not adding up.

    Glad to read that you are robustly well though, Prof. We can all drink to that.

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  12. Well that explains a lot. This is anything but PC, but did you know the heritability of IQ has a correlation coefficient of around 0.8? hehe, them dumb aussies

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