Monday, September 2, 2013

Otherwise occupied until tonight

At Imperial Bearbrass the committee frowns upon antics such as these.

UPDATE: How do they manage to get such speed out of golf carts? Well here's a tip that will be useful for anyone contemplating a holiday on  Hamilton Island, where such vehicles are the only approved means of motorised transport: open the engine bay, find the carby and give the throttle-contol stop nut a few turns. The formerly sedate conveyance will then be able attain what must be about 40kph -- and more than that on a decent incline.

And here is another tip for those who roll their surreptitiously hotted-up golf sleds:

First, collect spilled passengers and severed limbs from ditches and roadside trees.

Second, return the stop nut to its original position.

Third, when the hire company desk jockey indicates you will be charged for damage, throw a pink fit and announce that you will be suing for damages, psychological trauma,  loss of conjugal rights (this happens immediately upon your companion striking the tarmac) and anything else that comes to mind.

Your holiday will end unencumbered by liens and with an apology packed in your suitcase.


  1. 40 MPH:


  2. A friend and I recently found ourselves in the rare situation of having to knock a small ball around a paddock with an oddly shaped metal bludgeon.

    As he asked me at the time, 'What sort of miserable life would you have to lead to want to play golf every weekend?'

  3. Hey Professor,

    Buy a CD from this guy:

    I'll be very surprised if you don't get a good laugh out of it!