Saturday, August 3, 2013

Take these columnists....please

Q: Why does the Age publish Anthony Lowenstein, today frothing about Serco's corporate exploitation of illegal aliens?

A: Because, after readers encounter humourist Danny Katz's latest effort, they will be in need of a proper laugh.

Q: What will happen to Danny Katz as Fairfax fades further and faster?

A: Greg Hywood's management consultants will recommend fusing their columns into a single, compound, semi-literary entity. For example:

I was sitting at home watching the telly and fart-charging the cushions after dinner with renewable methane, I TELL YOU, when a family of asylum seekers moved into the garage.

Hey, why not! It's better digs that a SERCO tent and I don't understand them any better than my wife understands me. But they're handy to have around.

Conditioned by indifference and capitalism's racist disdain and justifiably wary of rapacious Jews like our relatives my mother-in-law, they needed a cheer-me-up. So I told them to prepare for the day when Palestine is free before reading them my latest column about circumcising turnips in the check-out line at Coles......

Q: What will you see in the Age just before the newspaper goes out of business for good?

A: A compound column by Danny Katz, Anthony Lowenstein and Martin Flanagan. For example:

What if, instead of locking boat people in Danny's garage, we found the courage to recognise that many are dark-skinned and therefore infused with the magic genes that make Aborigines wonderful football players and mystically atuned to the bare, red earth of their adopted homelands, at least until the Jews turn up and steal it.

But, hey, it's not about them, it's about MEEEEEE!  

Well, you get the idea.


  1. A special kind of self-hating jew, who would be hated by everybody else whatever "race" they espoused- even if they were irish, black, arab or martian.

    Or whatever kind of cultural traitor Joe Hildebrand admits to being.

  2. Never forget Sammy Davis Jr. A bisexual person of color he joined up to the ZE voluntarily. Very special.

  3. Cannot understand why people think Joe Hildebrand is Jewish.

    Jews are usually funny.

    1. Hildebrand's ethnicity is not the point, his alacrity in taking the ALPBC's thirty pieces of silver is the issue.

      Pandering to racist perceptions of Australia and the anglosphere in general is a dog act.

      Our haters gave the world female circumcision, eating with sticks and overt unrelenting racism in two hundred times the span of history it took us to give the world pretty much everything from toilets and medicine that work to spaceships and electricity.

      So naturally he seeks to make his lucre by denigrating white civilised Australia as a place of hatred and intolerance.

      All of which makes me wonder if he's ever gotten his head out of his arse long enough to take a look at our country.