Saturday, May 18, 2013

Phew, that's a relief!

Who says media organisations devote themselves only to bad news?

As the above revelation was first published last October, somehow going unnoticed at the time, much thanks is owed to Fairfax's Ladies Pages for thoughtfully combing its archives and installing a retro-link in today's homepage. That's the thing about quality journalism: it endures.

And thanks also to Providence for the happy coincidence of the writer's family name. If Ms Clementine's surname had been, say, Apple instead Ford, an essay setting out to demolish the theory that vaginas are iPods would have made no sense whatsoever.


  1. But if used appropriately it can take you places.

  2. In keeping with the Prof's label...

  3. Perhaps Clementine Ford was suggesting that her vagina was something that you could drive a car into?

    1. Or, as Mike Carlton might have said: "Her vagina is something carloads could drive into." But Mike would have thought more soberly and said: "If she's offended, I'm sorry she's offended."

      Pedro of Adelaide

  4. "And vaginas don’t come with a goddamn steering lock." --- Well, thank goodness for that! 'Cause I'm sure my dizzy headed darling (don't you just love those little women) would forget the combination!

  5. Elizabeth (Lizzie) B.May 19, 2013 at 8:43 AM

    Well, Prof, I've never regarded mine as a 'B.' by making the leap to insects, either.

    Hard to comprehend the cognitive and linguistic gymnastics of some quality journalists, I do agree.

  6. Clementines, though, "... tend to be very easy to peel, like a tangerine, but are almost always seedless. For this reason they are sometimes known as seedless tangerines; the clementine is also occasionally referred to as the Algerian tangerine. They are typically juicy and sweet, with less acid than oranges."


  7. Oh my darlin, look where it got the Slapper in Chief.