Monday, October 17, 2011

"Your Fine Is In The Mail"

VICTORIA is looking for a new slogan. Put aside any thoughts that we don’t actually need little snippets of boosterism slapped on expensively re-printed letterheads and contemplate how best to sum up this beautiful and peculiar corner of our wide brown land. How about:

·       Smile For The Revenue Camera
·       Fine Place For Drivers
·       We’re Watching You
·       Behave!
·       Citizens Are What Government Must Put Up With
·       Infested With Bicycles
·       Warning: Slow People In Lycra
·       We’re Not South Australia
·       Home of Ted And The Claytons Conservatives
·       Liberal Government, Labor Bureaucrats

Quite a few years ago, our number plates were graced with a perfectly fine slogan: Victoria, The Garden State.

Why not revive it?


  1. Feel free to insult Michael "Windscreens" O'Brien

  2. Because gardens require watering which is planet-destroying?

  3. PhillipGeorge(c)2011October 17, 2011 at 10:56 AM

    because Gardens are man made Prof!

    and dams? if they were really so bad fish would refuse to fuck in them for ideological reasons.

  4. Love the last one, so apt

  5. Victoria - The Nanny State

  6. I suggest:

    "Victoria, The Dead Garden State."

    thanks to water restrictions.

  7. Anonymous, you're not far from the mark. I think they actually did have licence plates which read "Victoria, The Safety State".

    Someone correct me if I'm wrong...

  8. I know it is a bit confronting message for kiddies, but it would help Red Ted if he saw this message often in a given day.

    Victoria - Dear Premier, Grow a Pair

  9. err, how about The Victorian State

  10. Vics - they come to Qld with one clean shirt and $20 and change neither whilst here.....

  11. The garden state slogan on licence plates started in New Jersey in 1954. The NJ governor tried to veto the idea because it was stupid, but the legislature insisted. The original description of NJ as the garden state was from 1876.

  12. Victoria: The Shut Up! State

  13. Western Australia, The State of Excitement ...

    Official Animal: the Numbat.

    I just don't know how anyone could top that.

  14. Victoria: Another Mord-ant State

  15. Prof, I suggest only a slight change to 'Victoria, the Garden State' is needed.

    How about:

    Victoria, the Guarded State